Not Showing Up

I totally agree with the comments made on this topic. I only contact those who I believe have the same interests and are located somewhere where there is a realistic chance of meeting. Since I am only into irl, I make very sure before agreeing to meet someone, and once I do agree to meet, I always show up. It is just fair.

want to know what's worse? Trying to find someone who shares the same interest as you do and are not very far, but are unwilling to pursue the opportunity to meet up and then complain about the distance. I can understand distances between 300-goodness'knows'how'long, but anything below that is a weak excuse. I would be more than will to travel at least 100-200 miles if I had a car. But jeez, it sucks >:(

I agree with you totally fhall2...that has happened to me too. I spend time online making connections, folow up with e-mails and chats and than my opponent is a "no show". I understand when things unforseen occur but at least be honest and communicate if you are not going to show up for a match especially when one travels a great distance. It sucks big time buddy. Been there and I am sure so have many others......

Thank you. At you understand where I am coming from.

Well said Wrestle Fun, you have to take the rough with the smooth and not take the timewasters personally as they almost certainly do it to everybody!

Unfortunately their are some time wasters out there, and personally I wouldn't let them get to me although it is very annoying when they fail to show or cancel last minute.

On some occassions people have had to cancel a match with me for what could be and have been very genuine reasons. As long as you have a genuine reason and let people know I think that we all have to except that sadly this is going to sometimes happen.

I know that unfortunately I have had to cancel a couple of matchs, including one the other day when the mat room which i had booked cancelled the booking. on this occasion I pasted a copy of the email into the message and hoped the other person would understand which they did. I also had another match cancelled because the person I was due to meet broke a rib wrestling.

I have decided not meet in hotels now as I have been let down so often with hotel matchs that its not worth the financial loss of paying bookings or traveling and finding their not there!

I work rotating shifts due to my job which makes arranging meets slightly harder and means I have to plan meets depending on my shift rotation. I explain this to people and hopefully most have understood my reasons.

I think we need to except that some people are easier to arrange meets with than others due to thier lifestyle and personal commitments.

I always ask for a face picture and a phone number, if you get both of those then your 5O% there, I have found these people to be the most reliable. Then there's those that talk about meeting for matches and you soon realise that their unreliable and possibly never going to make a commitment!

Theres a couple of people on here that I'd really like to meet for a wrestle, sadly my work shifts have really hindered us meeting up, hopefully though I will get to wrestle with them :-]

Lets all enjoy the sport of wrestling and have some fun

Actually, what pisses me off more is a few who contact u at short notice when someone else has cried off and then try to frame it as your problem.

Funny, though, I've been called unreliable and a 'fake' just because I have actually said 'no' upfront to some guys when asked to wrestle.

You can tell the signs after you've been on here for awhile but there are no cast iron guarantees! Recomms are a good indicator but I've recently been let down twice in quick succession by a guy with several fights under his belt and some recomms to go with them.

I accept that you have to really want to wrestle - it's not something you can do half-heartedly or feeling off-colour but I'd far rather the guy texted me to cancel than either dip out without notice or turn up for the sake of it. Like another commenter mentioned - do they think I've nothing better to do than waste my time standing outside Pippas - it's 2 hours travel!!

What I also can't help mentioning is that there are comments on here from individuals who most definitely do not practice what they preach on here. I'm stunned at their hypocrisy.

Always exchange mobis and names - if the guy doesn't he's very unlikely to be genuine.

Maybe ask a phone number and have a call ! and maybe after speaking a little bit, you can identiy fake person ... Since I meet wrestlers, tchatting or phoning gives me enough feeling to know about the wrestler ... Maybe I am lucky ... :-)

I've been lucky but then most of the guys I meet are already known to other guys I have fought. Plus I only meet guys for wrestling, not wrestling+sex, so the whole fluctuating libido thing doesn't come into it.

There are some VERY good guys on this site, VERY good, serious fighters; I have met and fought several of them. But I very rarely arrange to meet someone within minutes of getting a message out of the blue from someone I don't know, I usually want to talk around it a bit, ask them about their experience, who they have wrestled, what style, etc. etc.

The best thing is definitely to find a guy with a good reputation, and that is where this site beats all other wrestling sites hands down, thanks to its extra features. If a guy has great pictures, big muscles, shiny shorts, it don't mean a thing if he has zero past opponents and zero recommendations.

I understand it is harder if you don't live in a big city, but the same principles apply. Don't make plans too quickly, chat around it first. Talk to him on the phone too, to get a better feel for him. And if you DO meet some good guys, ALWAYS post a recommendation.

The more we use this system, the more effective it becomes. I met one wrestler for just a drink a few months ago; we didn't have time to arrange a fight venue as he was only visiting, but I still posted a rec on his profile to say I got a good impression of him as a person. Now, if someone is considering him for a match, it at least tells them that he's not a total fruitcake.

For guys wanting to box with me, I alwats ask in email, if they have been in an organized boxing program. If they say no, it is likely they will not show. There are exceptions of course, but this is a good starting point question.

Luckily, I have never been let down (yet) but I have heard there are a minority (usually egomaniacs or social isolates) who dont even bother to notify/text before or after the event or you get some pathetic excuse. You just have to develop a feel for the fakes, "keyboard fighters." A reliable sign that they are flaky is that they do text you at 6am and give you 2 hours notice. They are usually playing with you because they are insecure and may even be a sock puppet. Just hit the delete button then block them. If we all did that, they'd be alienated and have nowhere to go to play their puerile games.

It is most surely disappointing when people don't have the "manhood" to make the effort far enough in advance to either cancel or make an alternative appointment. I work for the airlines so I usually try to make my appointments and challenges on scheduled layovers. That way I'm not out of anything, if someone doesn't show. On the other hand there have been times when, due to situations beyond my control, I've been delayed or reflowed, and as you know, because of federal laws, I am not allowed to call immediately. I try to keep my potential opponents in the loop, and it has only rarely happened. Most of my friends are good natured about it, and we reschedule for as soon as we can. I know how important their time is.

My biggest pain along this subject is guys who just won't say "Oh sorry, no thanks" when I send them a message. I know at that point not to bother them again. I'm a big boy, and god only knows I have my likes and dislikes, so I can certainly understand if I'm not someone's "type".
Thanks for putting this thread up.
Sid

I have lost track of times people have challenged me, promised to come down for a weekend afternoon or early weekday evening for a wrestle.... do they think the mats stay clean in a wrestle room?? Do they not expect fresh towels, a clean shower room and the wrestle room att he right temperature with fresh bottled water available too?? Do they seriously think I spend all afternoon waiting for them to come over and have nothing else to do?? So why do they not bother to cancel with sufficient notice, or even cancel at all? They just dont show up or come up with some lame excuse why they couldn't cancel..

Last weeks was LondonGrappleGuy... He frequently texts to challenge me at 6am offering me a match at 8am !! Eventually we planned for last weekend... guess what.... He didnt show up as he was too busy with lunch to text me he wasn't comming!! Previous excuses from guys because they are injured, but the excuse came 3 days too late AFTER he found out I had discussed his no-show with another wrestler... Time wasters seem to rule on here!! as do those that just want your MSN and email for selling to porn and marketing web-sites! BE WARNED!!!

Well guys, it has happened to me again - two more times with two different guys. I have removed my profiles from this site, Globalfight, and Big Muscle Bears (it is NOT the sites fault - it's the JERKS on them) because I cannot deal with this IDIOTIC BULLSHIT. Maybe in a few weeks, or months, after I cool off, I might decide to return. In the meantime, you all have led me to try going straight; I'll try women for a while and see if they are just as shitty. Have a nice day :(

btw: All you married guys on the "down-low" on this site, who only have 35 minutes to spare out of a 168 hour week should form your own "Sorry, I can't make it" site, and screw each other over.

A call or text is not unreasonable if something crops up last minute - to not do so is uncalled for and from a personal perspective I would not actively look to arrange a meet with the individual again. The recommendations and people fought options on here are very useful as is the good old-fashioned word-of-mouth! :)

While sometimes tempted, the problem with "naming and shaming" the keyboard scrappers who go for that extra twisted fun(?) of fixing to meet up then failing to show without managing to let you know is it creates bad karma. Only near-antidote I've found is to go the "recommendation" route (much assisted by the "past opponents" function on here). It still leaves a problem for new guys kicking off but does mean you get less cranky/pissed off and can spend your time and energy on fighting men who fight rather than type-).

I think there's a big difference. Failing to turn up without warning is a nightmare, but sometimes things do crop up so calling to cancel (preferably with good notice!) is definitely better IMO.

The advantage of this site is that you can see if they have actually fought another guy and also check out if anyone has actually recommended them. At least it gives a clue as to how reliable the man is.

Hi mate, unfortunately like everywhere there is an a...holes but this shouldn't put you off this or any other wrestling sites and sometimes you should just call and ask the person what was the reason for it it may be a genuine problem which prevented him to meet you. If you find out is a timewaister just expose him on this site so nobody will bother anymore with him and this is the way we should fight back.

Hey guys, what is the big popular thing nowadays with setting up a match, and then not showing up or calling to cancel?

I have NEVER done that to any other wrestler, but I have it done to me regularly.

Should I just decide that everybody is an A**HOLE, and drop my profiles from this site, Globalfight, and Big Muscle Bears; or continue to wait and hope that someday I will meet a real valid intelligent adult person.