The thing is, I don't know how to end that sentence.

Wrestler? I guess, but I don't know enough to even call myself something more than interested in the idea of it. It's fun. I did it a bit when I was a kid, but that was decades - literal decades - ago. I defend okay, but I know zero about offense or even tactics. It's a fun thing to do, but nothing I could even be remotely serious about.

Then there's the people here. There are so many people here and they are all into so many different things and types of things. I'm still learning about what I even like when it comes to this. There's a lot to consider.

  • Erotic stuff: I don't know what I feel about this completely. Sometimes, it's okay and seems like it would be fun. Other times, I am concerned about possibly having to stop someone from taking things too far. So far, boundaries have been very much respected in this. Is this something I want to look for in every match? Probably not, but then again, probably. I don't know. I really don't.
  • Bare-knuckles: I just can't with the reading about people going home with things broken, nearly-broken, or bleeding. Sparring can be fun, but if I'm out to make you bleed, you are my enemy and my goal should be to have you not be able to harm me or any other being... to put it lightly.
  • Boxing: This is fun. I can get into it, but I'd have to re-purchase all of my gear, but that could be done.
  • Gear: Do I want to invest here or not? It would only be a couple of hundred that I wouldn't really miss at most. I'll get into it during the summer, most likely.

I guess it would be easier to figure out what and who I want to grapple/roll/etc with if I knew what niche I wanted to fit into. The other people here seem very specific in what they want to do and I'm really, really generalized.

I'm sure there are a lot of advantages to being so open, but the one thing I have to consider is being competent at things. Especially when you have people that need you to adjust for their level of intensity. I'm probably good for being thrown about and rolled into a ball in terms of wrestling and sometimes, I just flat-out have fun being man-handled.

I don't always want to win. I'm not especially competitive, either.

I'm just here to have fun. Other people here seem to be very serious about the thing they are into. I admire that, but I'm also just as likely to be seen as a waste of effort for that very reason.

Where do I even begin to invest the time to develop the kind of expertise where someone will want to repeat a meetup? I mean, once we meet and become friends, I can relax, but before then, I have a lot to think about.

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synxiec님이 2014-04-12 오후 7:09에 마지막으로 수정
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